Life's Choices

There are so many choices we make in life that lead us to different situations. And each of these situations give rise to more decisions and so the tree continues. I sometimes wonder what life would be like if I had stayed in Australia, if I had gone to UK to do my PhD or chosen Princeton instead of Caltech. Right now, I'm not sure where I'll go for work. There are so many possibilities and to choose is difficult. If there are less choices available, then life may be easier. Because there is no thinking of 'what ifs'. I hope the choice that I make in terms of where to live and which company to work for will result in the most positive outcome. And of course, the most positive outcome is where I will be the happiest. People in the past, their objectives are to have a full stomach and stay warm. And having that would likely keep them content. But modern day humans are exposed to so many opportunities that make us wonder what it would be like to have this or to do that (such curiosity likely led to the uprise of the human civilization, but can also lead to it's downfall) and thus happiness is on average harder to attain. Anyway, I will probably end up in Germany, Switzerland or stay in the US (in order of current preference). I want a new start, meet new people, live in a new place and be more caring, more outgoing and more flexible - in short, be a better person. I, like everyone else have the potential to be a better person.

I've decided to go back to horse riding. I like cycling, but I don't feel it's natural for me and being on the saddle, I constantly feel that I will fall off and that's a horrible feeling. On the other hand, for horse riding even though I have fallen off and broken my back - it just feels....right. When descending while cycling, if my tire blew up, then my bike would be a pile of mess and so would I. In horse riding, when I fall, the horse would stop next to me and be there again when I need him. I have more trust in an animal than in a piece of metal, even if the animal has a mind of it's own. In any case, I am going back to horse riding, but I need to plan it out so that I have enough money to last me till the end of the year. Perhaps I'll start again in a couple of months time.

It's Chinese new year now, at times like this, I miss my family even more and wish that they are here to celebrate with. On a positive note, I think I'll be home for CNY next year. The plan is to graduate at the end of this year, stay at home for 2 months, then travel around the world for a few months (which will open my eyes to the world - damn I CAN'T wait!!) before going for my new job in June or so in 2013. :) :) :)